I was born very young and small in the hills of southern West Virginia. As a child I had a Mr. Microphone, and used to talk up songs on the radio like I was a DJ. Even at four years old, I knew this would be my only chance at getting any lady action as an adult. A lot of stuff happened between then and now. Those events are as follows: Wrecked my bike and cracked my skull, got a cat, Atari, elementary school, cat died, Nintendo, new cat, Disney world, bad sunburn, middle school, cat died, fell off bike again, this time balls turn purple, high school, first car, girls, wreck some cars..ouch, see Grateful Dead (discover many new things), find greatest cat ever, get arrested for being stupid (thanks for bail and Waffle House Mom), college (didn’t make it to the end), 28 different jobs, hundreds of concerts, millions of beers, win first radio job in a game of pool (no joke), hang out in Canada and Mexico, lots of girls, best cat ever dies, we start Bob Rocks, I get a big TV…..That’s about it, my life in a paragraph.
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METALLICA is launching its own summer music festival. It's called the Orion Music and More festival . . . and it's being held June 23rd and 24th in Atlantic City, New Jersey.
Metallica will headline each night, but they're doing completely different sets.
They're playing the entire "Black Album" the first night, and all of "Ride the Lightning" the second night. (--At least it isn't "Lulu".)
The rest of the lineup will consist of some of Metallica's favorite bands, including Arctic Monkeys, Avenged Sevenfold, Modest Mouse, the Gaslight Anthem, Cage the Elephant, Hot Snakes, Titus Andronicus and [Effed] Up. More will be announced later.
Two-day passes cost $150 for the public, and $125 for fan-club members. Hit up OrionMusicAndMore.com for more information.
The cops in Vermont HAD to know they were setting themselves up for trouble, right?
They actually put PRISONERS in St. Albans, Vermont in charge of designing a new decal for the squad cars of state troopers. So naturally, those prisoners included a hidden message. A very subtle picture OF A PIG.
The decal features a cow with spots, and one of the spots is unmistakably a pig. About three dozen squad cars got the new decals before someone noticed.
The authorities are handling this in a very Vermont way . . . laid back and completely indifferent.
Vermont's Public Safety Commissioner, Keith Flynn, is a former cop . . . he says, quote, "This is not as offensive as it would've been years ago. We can see the humor."
There's no word on what, if anything, will happen to the inmates who made the decals.
On Monday, we told you about the WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER: A guy named Jason Elia bought two Super Bowl tickets so he could propose to his girlfriend at the game . . . but she DUMPED him after he was diagnosed with bladder cancer.
Then he decided to give the tickets away . . . only SHE still wanted them. Or DID SHE? Jason told one radio show his girlfriend was named Sokhon Sen. The British paper "The Daily Mail" tracked her down . . . and she denied the whole story.
And we mean the WHOLE story: There was no Super Bowl ticket offer, no dumping him after cancer, she wasn't Jason's girlfriend, and she only MET him ONCE.
She said, quote, "I wouldn't call Jason someone I dated. More like some creepy person now that I met once in my whole life."
Jason stands by his story about getting dumped due to cancer. But he said Sokhon was NOT the ex-girlfriend who dumped him. Although he DIDN'T explain why he said she was in the first place.
IT'S BIO TIME!
